Four Years
Remembering our wedding ceremony.
Header photo by Lee Funke.
The backstory
This may be a bit weird, but roll with it. We’ve dedicated this blog to be a place for friends, family, coworkers, neighbors, acquaintances and strangers to get to know us openly, honestly, vulnerably and wholly. As a space meant to tell stories as husband and husband, we thought we’d share the words from our wedding ceremony and go back to the day our married life began.
The past four years have brought a lot of change. Some of it challenging. Some of it remarkable. We’ve spent the first four years under an administration that discounts our community. We’ve travelled to new corners of the world together. We’ve questioned some relationships, found new ones and grew apart from others. We bought a condo, sold a condo and found a home that gives us more than we thought it would. We welcomed our niece and celebrated a 100th birthday. We scored more family when A’s dad got remarried and reunited with old classmates. We’ve learned new jobs. Coped with mental and physical health. And got the pick of the litter. We marched. We voted. We quarantined.
Whatever the next year brings, these words spoken by A’s stepdad on our wedding day regrounds and reminds us that we have everything we need in love.
Eric and Aaron’s wedding day on November 20, 2016, in Kailua on the island of Oahu. Officiant is Aaron’s stepdad Dwight Takamine. Photo by Tess Carges.
Our wedding ceremony
Today, we come together in this place of natural beauty to be joyful, in celebration of the relationship of Aaron Komo and Eric Loehr.
By their commitment to marry each other, they are saying yes to love, yes to caring, and yes to family.
May the Spirit of God – which is in the blue sky, in the wind, and in the energy of the ocean – enter your bodies, fill your hearts, and bless your lives.
The U.S. Supreme Court stated in one of its landmark cases, “No union is more profound than marriage, for it embodies the highest ideals of love, fidelity, devotion, sacrifice, and family. In forming a marital union, two people become something greater than once they were. As some of the petitioners in these cases demonstrate, marriage embodies a love that may endure even past death. It would misunderstand these men and women to say they disrespect the idea of marriage. Their plea is that they do respect it, respect it so deeply that they seek to find it’s fulfillment for themselves. Their hope is not to be condemned to live in loneliness, excluded from one of civilization’s oldest institutions. They ask for equal dignity in the eyes of the law. The Constitution grants them that right.”
And this is the law of our land.
Now I will ask for the exchange of vows to formalize this special union.
Aaron, please repeat after me:
I Aaron take you Eric to be my life’s partner,
To speak truthfully to you in love,
I promise to honor and tenderly care for you,
I promise to cherish you and to encourage your own fulfillment as a person, through all the changes in our lives.
Eric, if you could please repeat after me:
I Eric take you Aaron to be my life’s partner,
To speak truthfully to you in love,
I promise to honor and tenderly care for you,
I promise to cherish you and to encourage your own fulfillment as a person, through all the changes in our lives.
The rings that you have chosen are a unique blend of blond Curly Koa and dark Curly Koa wood that reflects the diversity of this hardwood grown only in Hawaii. They also symbolize the diversity of the people who call Hawaii home. As you move forward in your life together, may these rings also represent the special bond that ties you to Hawaii. To understand Aaron and Eric as a couple, is to appreciate how diversity plays a fundamental role in their lives.
We will now have the exchange of rings:
Aaron: I give you this ring as a symbol of my continuing faith and abiding love, wear it with joy as I choose you to be my partner, this day and every day.
Eric: I give you this ring as a symbol of my continuing faith and abiding love, wear it with joy as I choose you to be my partner, this day and every day.
This morning, there is a special warmth here – it comes not only from the Hawaiian sun, but from each and every person who is here to share and help celebrate this beautiful day. Each of you have played a role and in your own particular way have supported Aaron and Eric, and you are the people who matter so much in their lives.
As they take this step today, a new ‘Ohana is created – one that unites two very special families and includes many, many friends. And this new ‘Ohana will continue to support our couple, as they move forward in their lives.
Aaron and Eric, you have chosen to share a poem with your family and friends on this special day.
The Poet Rumi wrote:
“Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing and rightdoing, there is a field.
I’ll meet you there.”
Ladies and gentlemen, family and friends, by virtue of the authority vested in me, I declare that Aaron and Eric, having pledged their love for each other in this public ceremony, are now marriage partners.
Aaron and Eric - please celebrate your life!
